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Conversely, I can never think of any men to fix up with my numerous friends who are attractive and successful women in their 40s and 50s.

At 51, I'm rigidly set in my ways — some might even say I'm "spectrum-y" — and I have a lot of opinions that don't correspond with those of most people. Yet during periods when I have been single, many people offer to set me up with their attractive and successful female friends.

It’s no secret that dating changes radically as you get older.

As you can see below, the number of online daters peaks at 24, drops sharply at around 30, and then gradually tapers off, as the remaining singletons either find mates or withdraw themselves from contention: The bar chart here shows how the woman to man ratio changes over time. In a better world, this would imply that older people don’t necessarily have a harder time finding decent mates than younger ones, as the composition of the dating pool holds relatively steady from age to age.

“If that were true, they would be lowering their standards. In fact, she notes that older women are a lot more selective than older men and younger women are when it comes to picking a partner If anything, it’s more of a level playing field when it comes to midlife dating.

In a talk before boomers (you can watch it below), Adshade says older women really aren’t disadvantaged on the dating market.

Here’s what’s happened in the past year — two girlfriends have gotten engaged, and one has her condo on the market and is looking with her boyfriend to buy a new place and move in together. So, because of that and the fact that we live longer, she says, it’s worth putting the time and energy into looking for love regardless of your age.

They are all 50-something, empty-nesters and divorced. The difference between men and women at this age, however, is that we don’t necessarily want the same things.

That isn’t true for my three girlfriends, but it’s true for me.

Women, on the other hand, prefer guys closer to their own age.

In September, a study of 12,000 Finns reaffirmed what prior research had already established. If dudes were really so set on their caveman-era mating habits, wouldn't we see more single ladies over 30 home knitting tea cozies on Friday nights?

Pictured below are some single users in their mid-thirties or early forties, taken from the first couple pages of my own local match search.

Nothing I’ll talk about today pertains necessarily to any one of them, but I wanted to put forward some people to go with the statistical discussion.




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